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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25727635">Jealousy</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Agentrogers17/pseuds/Agentrogers17'>Agentrogers17</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Adorable Newt Scamander, Cinnamon Roll Newt Scamander, Dragon Pox, Dragon Sickness, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Idiots in Love, Near Death Experiences, Protective Newt Scamander, Protective Theseus Scamander, St Mungo's Hospital, plus size reader</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 11:02:29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>4,941</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25727635</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Agentrogers17/pseuds/Agentrogers17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Who wouldn't want to be Newt Scamander's bff and travel the world with the sweet boy. The issue? You have dragon pox and older Scamander was your lover.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Leta Lestrange/Theseus Scamander, Newt Scamander/Reader, Theseus Scamander/Reader</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>40</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Jealousy</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It has been a while since I stepped foot in London. I took a deep breath in a big sniff of the moisty smell. The weather was surprisingly clear. The ship was approaching the dock, the tall ginger beside me gave an exited huff. I smiled at his cute face, no matter how old or how tall he got, he still was the cute Hufflepuff I met all those years ago. I linked my arm around his, resting my head on his upper arm. He smiled at me, one of the rare times he was not extra shy and awkward. I loved the man deeply; he was my family at this point. After 15 year-long friendship, I trusted him with everything.</p><p>"We are home," he whispered. </p><p>"We are," I replied not as enthusiastic as him. I missed London, just not the people in it. </p><p>"It is going to be alright," he whispered, "We won't see him unless it is totally necessary. You don't even have to come to the Ministry."</p><p>"He is your brother, Newtie. And I am your best friend. At some point, I'll have to face him," I told him, rubbing his arm gently.</p><p>"You don't have to deal with him. You have enough in your plate," he said brows furrowing. I knew he was worried, that was the reason we were returning this soon.</p><p>"Newt," I said softly, "you need to talk with your brother. It would be best if you weren't alone in case," before I could continue, he turned to me with a determination written all over his face.</p><p>"No. Not in case. You are going to get better. We have an appointment at St. Mungo's tomorrow. You will take your potions, and you will get better," he said, pressing a kiss to my forehead as we stepped to the ground—his suitcase in his free arm, other arm wrapped around me. I smiled at the man. Since the moment I was diagnosed, he took care of me, just as one of his beasts. I thought to be his best friends was one of the best positions in the world, but Merlin I needed to see mummy Newt see how wrong I was. We apparated to the house we shared; we never separated from the first day of Hogwarts, and we didn't want to change that in our adult life. So we just moved in together. It was one of the reasons why Theseus and I couldn't last, his jealousy over Newt and I, the kinship we shared. I knew we wouldn't last. But it never prevented me from falling in love with Theseus. I could still see his cerulean eyes staring at me, his touch lingering on my skin, his warmth surrounding me when he would pull me closer to his solid chest. But it was in the past; he was to get married in a year with Leta. The girl who nearly took away my best friend from me, and succeeded to take my ex-lover. I couldn't blame her about the second, though. It was Theseus who left me, Leta entered the picture later, he knew marrying Leta would hurt me more than anyone else he could choose. We were total opposites. She was tall, slender, beautiful. And I was shorter, full of bumps and rolls and just me. With the dragon pox poisoning my blood, my skin took a yellow-greenish undertone, which made me even less of a competition with her, if I ever were one. </p><p>The house was as clean as we left it months ago, thanks to magic. The house was empty of any kind of food, except tea. Newt helped me to my room, and with magic, he changed me into my pyjamas, "Newt, it is still daytime," I objected as he ushered me into the covers. </p><p>"You are tired, we both know that. And you need rest more than ever. I will go buy groceries, and you are not allowed to get out of this bed."</p><p>"I can help," I protested.</p><p>"You can help by resting. If you sleep more than an hour, we can cook together," he said, pressing a kiss to my head, "Do you want anything special? Some fruits? Desert?"</p><p>"Soup?" I asked. I couldn't stomach many things. But the soup was always the right choice, even when I was on one of the bad days I could eat soup without throwing up. He brushed my hair, and I went to sleep a few minutes after.</p><p>I woke up with Newt's distressed voice talking with someone. </p><p>"You need to leave. I don't want her to see you; she is in enough pain. She needs to recover, and I won't let you hinder the process. You have done enough," there was only one person in London that Newt would speak with so much fire and anger. My sweet Hufflepuff wouldn't talk with anyone like that unless they hurt him, me or the beasts.</p><p>"What happened to her? Why does she look sick? What have you done to her?" The person, my ex-lover, Newt's brother, Theseus, asked. Fantastic, he came to my room as I sleep. Not that I cared; he already left me; I didn't have anything to lose to the man. </p><p>"Because she is sick. And needs rest. You have to leave. She'll wake up soon, and she doesn't need you to hurt her anymore!"</p><p>"I won't leave before you tell me what happened to her! I won't leave before you tell me if she is okay! She is my...", but Newt interrupted him harshly. </p><p>"She is not your anything. You lost the privilege to call her yours the moment you left her an went to snog Leta. The only woman you knew would destroy her after what happened at Hogwarts. You knew she wouldn't be able to take it, and you still did it. And you stand here demanding to know what happened to her? How dare you think you deserve to even be under the same roof with her?"</p><p>"I love her," my breath hitched.</p><p>"Get out," Newt hissed. I couldn't recognise his voice for a second. Never during the years, I knew Newt, have I heard this much venom and anger in his voice.</p><p>"Tell me what happened to her, and I will leave. Tell me so I can help."</p><p>"She has dragon pox—a progressive one. And we don't need your help. I will take care of her, as I always do. That's how you love someone, not by hurting them until they can't breathe anymore, then act as nothing happened. Now, leave. I need to cook."</p><p>"Will she be okay? Is she dying?" Theseus' voice cracked at the second question. My heart broke at hearing him breaking, the man who always was the strongest person I have ever met. Newt didn't answer or just whispered; I just didn't hear anything. I heard the door open and close, and the shaky breath that Newt let out. I was dying. We both were aware of that. But Newt was an optimist and a fighter. I knew I wouldn't last this long if Newt weren't by my side all this time. </p><p>"You heard, didn't you?" He asked as he watched me from the doorway of my room. I just nodded. He silently climbed into the bed next to me and pulled me to his chest. For anyone who knew Newt, it was a bold move for him, but I grew up with the man, at some points we got too used to each other's presence. And his shyness did not exist with me; he knew I would never judge him, so he always spoke and acted freely with me. </p><p>"How is he?" I whispered in his shoulder. His hands were massaging my shoulder blades softly.</p><p>"Still a prick."</p><p>"He is your brother Newt."</p><p>"You are more of a sibling to me; he has ever been."</p><p>"You know I feel the same about us. But, it doesn't change the fact that he indeed is your brother. And we both know I might not make it."</p><p>"You will make it. Healing takes time. You will get better."</p><p>"Newt, I just don't want you to get hurt. I don't want you to stay alone. We both suck at making friends. We found each other and didn't bother to make any more friends. Even my boyfriend was your brother."</p><p>"You deserved better than him."</p><p>"Newt, it is not about me anymore. He and I are over. He is getting married soon. And we are not sure if I will live to see it. But you will, and I need you to be on good terms with him, so he can support you when I am gone."</p><p>"You won't be gone."</p><p>I kissed his hair, my soft boy with a golden heart. </p><p>"Let's go cook; then we can have a pyjama party tonight."</p><p>***</p><p>We were in London for more than two months now. I was getting weaker every day, some days I barely got out of bed, Newt carrying me for bathroom. Bless the man, his time with his beasts made him stronger, that he could handle me who was almost twice the size of a normal girl. But taking care of me and the beasts the same time took its toll on him. He was tired. And he started to realise that I might not make it, even till the next year. I could see his tears when he would watch me in the middle of the night. Bunty was helping him with the beasts, but he wouldn't let anyone but him touch me. Some of the creatures would visit me from the basement. Especially Pickett and Dougal would sit with me during the day when Newt was busy. Dougal being a caretaker, often caressed my cheeks and braided my hair, helping Newt with feeding me. </p><p>"I need to go to the St Mungo's, to get you stronger potions," he whispered, worry grazing his beautiful greenish eyes, "I will be quick. Do you want anything, love? Whatever you feel like, I can get it."</p><p>"Just be careful, Newtie."</p><p>I was laying half asleep after Newt left, my heart was breaking for the man. I couldn't imagine myself watching him die for months. He was much stronger than anyone gave him credit for. I could hear Bunty working downstairs. She was a cute witch, awkward a bit, but she was a sweet girl. Dougal was wiping my forehead with a damp clothe; my fever was higher than ever. The door was being knocked, and I heard Bunty opening it. It was too early for Newt to be back. Before I could think who it was, older Scamander entered my room. His cheeks were flushed from running; he was still beautiful—curly brown hair on top of his head, piercing eyes and plump lips. He was tall, like Newt, with broader shoulders. </p><p>"Oh, beautiful girl," he sobbed and fell to his knees next to my bed. It was more than one and a half years since I saw him. His shaking hands found mine, and he held onto it, still crying, "I am so sorry. I am so sorry. You are burning up, darling you are burning up," he whispered. I could barely hold my eyes open. I knew he wasn't mine anymore, but, if I were dying right now, I would be okay with it. Him being the last thing I see. Noticing my unresponsiveness, he suddenly took me in his arms and rushed to the bathroom. He was starting to undress me, but I pushed his hands,</p><p>"No. You can't; you are engaged," I mumbled. Not really feeling okay. </p><p>"You are burning up, sweetheart. We have to lower your fever."</p><p>"No. I can't," I was still fighting him. Not much of a fight probably. </p><p>"Yes, you can. I am not engaged to her. Not anymore. I couldn't," he said, taking off my sleeping dress and leaving me in my knickers. With a flick of his wand, the tub was filled with icy water, and he lowered my naked body to it. I hissed at the cold feeling, but it felt good. I opened my eyes to see Theseus shrug off his jacket and rolled up his sleeves. A washcloth was in his hand, and he started dabbing my face with it. </p><p>"Did you lie?" I croaked, he took a deep breath and looked at me. </p><p>"No. I didn't."</p><p>"Why?"</p><p>"It already went for too long. It started as a mistake, and I was too stubborn to accept that I was an idiot. But with this, with you being sick. I realised life is not long enough, no matter how much I want it to be longer. I already lost almost two years without you and I can't. I can't lose any more time because I don't know how much you have left."</p><p>"You could be happy with her, Thes," I whispered, "I don't have much left, and I couldn't compare to her even if I had. You should go back to her."</p><p>"I can't. I won't."</p><p>"She loves you; she will forgive you."</p><p>"It is not about her (Y/N). I can't go to her because I don't love her. I love you, always have," he whispered. Tears were falling freely down his cerulean eyes. </p><p>"No, you don't. I am in a bad situation; you feel sorry it is a natural reaction."</p><p>"I got engaged to her because I was jealous of your relationship with Newt. I felt like I was losing you to him. And I wanted you to feel the same. And maybe love me more."</p><p>"You should go back to her," I whispered, feeling light-headed. </p><p>"I love you (Y/N). I love you. Why would I ever return to Leta?"</p><p>"Because I am dying," I whispered, the darkness surrounded me. I felt Theseus shake me and scream my name, but the darkness looked so peaceful so serene.</p><p>***</p><p>(Theseus' POV)</p><p>She stopped breathing. She stopped breathing, and I felt my heart stop. I pulled her body from the tub, wrapping her in a towel and apparating into the St. Mungos. I begged them to help her, to do something. Some nurses rushed to me with a stretcher. And she was taken away from me. My whole body was shaking, and if that was the last time I saw her if that was the last time she was alive, I didn't know how I'd live with myself, how I will have a life after this. </p><p>"Theseus?" I heard Newt's voice behind me. He didn't know yet, "why are you here? Why are you wet?"</p><p>"(Y/N)..." I whispered, frozen in shock. It felt like time stopped, and nothing would continue until she was there again. </p><p>"(Y/N)? What about (Y/N)? What do you have anything to do with her?"</p><p>"She... They took her. I visited, she was burning up, I tried to lower her fever, but she crashed."</p><p>"What do you mean she crashed?" Newt whispered, paler than I have ever seen him.</p><p>"She wasn't breathing Newt," I whispered.</p><p>"Oh," he whispered and sagged to the floor. He looked wracked. He looked like he lost everything. But he wasn't crying; he just stared at his hands.</p><p>"Newt," I whispered.</p><p>"I should prepare the documents," he said, getting up.</p><p>"What documents?"</p><p>"Obituary and funeral," he whispered. For the first time, I noticed there might not be an out of this situation. We really might have to say goodbye and bury her forever.</p><p>"She is not dead yet. They didn't announce anything," I protested. I was not ready. I couldn't accept her death yet. I didn't know how to. Before fucking everything up, the sole reason for my life was to grow old with her. To build a family with her see how she matured every day, see the first silver hairs in her head, the first wrinkles. Embrace and cherish her even when she would become a sweet old lady. My sweet old lady. But now, she might never grow older than 24. No. I couldn't let this happen. </p><p>"She won't make it Theseus. She gave up a long time ago. She wasn't sad when she was diagnosed, because she already was depressed. She already thought of ending things. This was just an opportunity. And I can't blame her. She never deserved that much pain."</p><p>"Newt, I was an idiot, I only did what I did because," I started to explain, but he just shook his hand.</p><p>"It doesn't matter anymore. You already took her away from me, forever."</p><p>"She is not dead yet," I seethed at my brother.</p><p>"Why do you care? Go back to Leta! Go to your fiance. You already abandoned her once, why wouldn't you do it again? Have you ever thought of how she got sick? Or if she wouldn't get sick if you weren't a cheating prick?"</p><p>"I never cheated on her. I would never."</p><p>"I saw what I saw Theseus. And I saw her crying herself to sleep, hating and blaming herself for a month. Then she got sick and drained every day a little more. She hasn't left her bed in the last six weeks. I watched her die a little more every day. Do you have any idea how much it hurt? Watch your closest friend, only friend, come closer to her death? Knowing with every day that passed, you had one less left with her."</p><p>"I love her," I sobbed. Newt just looked at me with pity and disgust in his eyes, "I was jealous of you and her. And wanted her to understand. I never loved Leta; I broke up with her. I love (Y/N)!"</p><p>"Was it worth it? Was it worth her life?" he whispered, tears falling from his eyes the first time. I wanted to hug him, I needed to hug him to comfort both of us, but he didn't let me. </p><p>***</p><p>For hours we sat on the hospital floor, it was late night by now. Newt sent a Patronus to his assistant about his creatures. I couldn't think of anything but the girl who was taken away from me almost 7 hours ago. The nurses would give us tight smiles, noticing the state of distress we were in. Some of the younger ones tried to offer food and coffee, but I couldn't even bother to answer them too focused on the door that separated me from my (Y/N). It was nearly morning when a healer exited the door looking tired but not defeated. Hope rose in my chest; I knew it was a mistake; if it were wrong, I would be destroyed.</p><p>"You are the family of Miss (Y/L/N)?" she asked. I nodded while Newt said yes. She gave us an understanding smile; I could see Newt looked like he had been in a battle, clothes wrinkled and messy, hair all over his face, eyes bloodshot. I probably didn't look any better.</p><p>"She is not dead, and I am sure that has been the first thing in your mind. But she is also not entirely alright. The pox had damaged half of her left lung; to a point, we couldn't repair with magic, it had to be cut off. A regenerating charm was placed to the organ, but they don't always give positive results. It will show its effects in a month; then we can make sure if it worked or not."</p><p>"If it didn't, will she die?" I whispered.</p><p>"No. She'll have the trouble of breathing as her lung size will be smaller than she needs, but we can fix it with a minor procedure. Her pox was cleaned from her body, but she still will sleep quite a lot."</p><p>"When can I take her home?" Newt asked, ignoring my presence.</p><p>"We need to watch her for a day; then you can take her."</p><p>***</p><p>Despite Newt's objections, I was there to take (Y/N) to his house the day she was released. She still was weak and had a yellowish tint to her skin but, Merlin, was she beautiful. Newt didn't really let me touch her at all, but it was okay, she was alive, breathing, awake and I was at her presence. It was enough. Newt wrapped his arms around her thick waist and her knees, lifting her in his arms. She wrapped her plump arms around his shoulders, resting her head on him. He pressed a quick kiss to her cheek, and the jealousy I had towards their relationship made itself known deep in my stomach. </p><p>"What would you like to eat?" Newt asked he covered her legs with a fluffy blanket. He got up quickly, and Doughal made its way to her lap, cuddling to her soft round chest. </p><p>"Soup?" she asked softly. </p><p>"Of course dove," he said, rushing to the kitchen. I sat on the couch next to her, her doe eyes lifting to meet my gaze. She gave me a small smile, and it was enough to make me cry.</p><p>"These," she whispered and opened her arms, pulling Doughal to sit between her and the couch. I fell to my knees and leaned into her chest. I cried openly, feeling her warmth and soft flesh under my face. Her smaller hands ran through my hair, lips pressing to the top. I just pulled myself closer to her body, her sweet scent surrounding me. </p><p>"I am okay, Theseus," she whispered, fingernails softly scratching the back of my head, "I am okay."</p><p>"I love you," I sobbed, "I love you so much. I know I probably you don't remember, but I was an idiot, it all happened because of me," she shushed me softly. Pressing a soft kiss.</p><p>"I remember, These, I remember what you said about Leta and engagement. And I am sorry you felt that way. But your brother and I are very close friends, and he is very dear to my heart. I knew it would affect my relationships, but I hoped you could understand, as his brother, you saw us grow up together, you know our bond and that we don't have any romantic feelings towards each other. It is in the past; you shouldn't blame yourself."</p><p>"I love you," I whispered, "I love you, and I don't deserve you, but darling, I love you so much, I can't live without you."</p><p>"I can't," she whispered, "I can't go through this again. You almost destroyed me, and I barely made it. If I will let myself love you again, and you'll stop, I can't survive that. We can be friends, we can spend time together, but I can't let you into my heart again," I sobbed, pressing myself further into her soft, plump flesh. She kept shushing me, but I knew she was right. She was afraid, and it was because of me. I couldn't hurt her again, even if it meant I would be hurting. </p><p>***</p><p>It was a summer evening; I was leaning against the window, breathing the fresh warm air into my lungs. I could hear my mother's humming as she set up the table. Newt and (Y/N) were to join the dinner soon; I arrived earlier eager to see the girl after not seeing her for a week, as she was at Scotland for a creature accompanying my brother. I missed her. Even though we weren't romantically in a relationship anymore, she allowed me to be her friend, and we would go to a walk, coffee or just sit at her and Newt's home every evening. I was craving her presence, just her to exist next to me. And I wasn't able to believe how I managed to let her go and live without her for that long, I always thought my stubbornness would be the death of me, but it nearly was her's. My thoughts were interrupted with a knock on the door before I could move, mum already opened it and welcomed them. </p><p>"Oh (Y/N) sweetheart, you look so radiant and healthy," she said, hugging her. We didn't tell her (Y/N)'s almost death until she was fully healed. (Y/N) was like a daughter to her, Newt brought her home the first Christmas in their first year. She had issues with her parents, so most of her time was spent at our house. My mother always wanted a daughter, and a cute, chubby eleven-year-old full of shyness and insecurity shading her younger son's was the only sign she needed to adopt her. I remembered times she would dot on her, braiding her hair every morning in complicated braids, dressed her in soft dresses, no matter how many times she got flustered that my mother spent so much on her. I remembered the time years after that day when she caught us kissing after one of the family dinners, in the shadows of the backyard, and was so excited to the chance of her becoming a Scamander, and so crashed after hearing our breakup and my engagement with Leta. She didn't talk with me for quite some time. My eyes found her round figure, a long dress adorning it. Deep V-neck of her dress showed the tops of her soft breasts, collarbones, thanks to the bun keeping her hair up, the decolletage of her upped middle back was seen. The dress was tight enough to show the soft curve of her belly, and the plumpness of her bum. Her arms gentle and round, high heeled shoes on her tiny feet. I missed seeing her, witnessing her beauty and perfection. She gave me a soft smile as I moved to greet her. I encircled her in a tight hug, which she returned a bit more gentle than I did. I pressed a kiss to her head,</p><p>"I missed you," I said, she just smiled and said,</p><p>"I was gone for merely a week."</p><p>"It still was too long."</p><p>I could see my brothers' and mothers' eyes on us—one with caution and other with hope. I lead her to the table, resting a hand on the curve of her lower back, not letting them say anything. The dinner went smooth; we talked, mum was worried about her health so asked again and again how she was, she always answered patiently, but Newt was annoyed. I knew after the scare she gave us Newt was taking even better care of her, contacting many healers and potion masters getting immunity strengthening potions for her and force-feeding her. First time in my life, I wasn't annoyed or jealous of his coddling. As long as she was alright, I could take their bond. The more time spent with them, the more it was evident that they were like siblings, but as Newt and she didn't have many people in their lives, they were dependent on each other. And maybe if I weren't an arsehole, she would also be in my life. </p><p>After dinner, Newt and mum went to look at her hippogriffs, and I was left alone with her. We were sitting at the backyard on the small swing bench, legs pressed against each other, swinging softly. It was peaceful, and I could feel her soft hip pressing into me, my arm around the back of the bench to give her more space. </p><p>"How was your week?" she asked, turning her pretty face to me. Her flowery smell surrounding me. </p><p>"Boring, as you weren't here. I got used to seeing you every day, and not being able to talk with you, see you, made me realised that I couldn't do it anymore. I just couldn't have a day in my life that you weren't with me."</p><p>"Theseus, we talked about this."</p><p>"I know, and I understand, but you need to know this. I am in love with you, always have been, and always will be. I know I hurt you, and it is okay if you don't want me back, you deserve the world. But I need you to know, and it is okay if you don't want me if you don't love me back. But you need to know," I whispered, she looked at me with a broken and unsure look in her eyes. Her beautiful face was full of emotions. And suddenly she did something I could only dare to dream of, she reached into me and pressed her lips to mine. My breath hitched in my throat, but I held onto her, my hands resting on her waist and hair. I kissed her, trying to contain my hunger for her; it's been almost three years since I tasted her lips since I lost myself in her sweet taste. I never thought I would be this lucky ever again, to hold her this close, to breath her in. </p><p>"I love you too," she whispered, I tried to look into her eyes, but I couldn't take my eyes off of her red from the kiss lips. </p><p>"I love you so much," I breathed out, pecking her lips over and over again. </p><p>"But," she said, and I felt myself stiffen with fear, "we have to take it slow, I am scared of us These," she murmured.</p><p>"That's alright with me, whatever you want, however you want, just say and it is yours," she smiled softly and pressed her lips into mine once more, making me pull her to my lap, to solve the height difference issue. And I kissed her, held her until we heard mum and Newt approaching, making us giggle like we were children once again. </p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Tell me what you think!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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